E and I are were just having an interesting conversation re: penises. Especially interesting conversation considering that E is a lesbian. She didn’t really contribute much to the conversation, actually. She listened and laughed. And encouraged me to post about it. Which is really all I can ask of her.
My opinion is that girth is way more important than length. I mean, a long skinny penis just pokes at your uterus. It likes poking a stick up there. On the other hand, a nice girthy penis is more like sticking a cucumber up there. Way more sensation. So … any guys who are concerned about how many inches long you are, don’t be. Worry more about the girthiness. And if you’re not girthy … well, just don’t ask me out. Hahaha … I’m kidding. I think.
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Great song or incredibly cheesy song? I’m listening to it right now and I still can’t decide. For the last 15 years I’ve been debating that question. There are some really great lyrics and then there’s “I’ll give you something sweet each time you come inside my jungle book.” Hmmm. It did make it to my Ipod Favorites. Which is like 1000 songs but still … I guess there must be some intrinsic value to this tune.
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I’m pleased to announce that I have noticed a rise in the usage of my particular language amongst my friends, their friends, etc. Calling someone a “good time” or a “bad time” seems to be particularly popular. “Rad” and “rockstar” are moving up in popularity. My platonic bf is really trying to incorporate this new vocabulary and I thank him for his effort. Of course, I used “stoked” on the phone with him last night, and I think that really threw him for a loop … baby steps. Have to remember to take baby steps. I’m going to have to come up with some new language so people don’t get bored. My friend/co-worker, E and I have entire conversations now that go as follows:
E: “Dude!”
L: “Dude!”
E: “Duuuuuuude.”
L: “Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude.”
Oddly enough, we both completely understand each other. It’s a beautiful thing.
So … someone was a little sore from the gym and, it may be that wonderful, fabulous time of the month I so look forward to. In an effort to alleviate my pain, I took 2 muscle relaxants. I feel pretty stoned. I just keep thinking of the sister getting married in “16 Candles” … “Love the teapot … “ That’s sort of me, right now. Actually, that’s the second time I referenced “16 Candles” in the last 24 hours. I also quoted “I can name 20 guys who would kill to love me.” Who knows the person who said that quote? And context, please. I’m sure Belden will know immediately and maybe Beav …
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but I just downloaded two songs from Color Me Badd … that’s right, bitches, Color Me Fucking Badd. “I Wanna Sex You Up” and “All 4 Love.” Fucking classics. I recall that in college my sister and I went to a Paula Abdul show with Color Me Badd opening. I was like 20 at the time and the oldest person there. Color Me Badd rocks … goddamn I love Itunes.
Ooooooh … “Walking in Memphis” … when is the last time I heard this song. It’s like I’m back in college, again. Love it love it love it.
“Now That We Found Love” by Heavy D. This song always reminds me of my friend, Flames. I just remember that she had this very traumatic experience in college watching the Tonight Show and Tony Danza was on tap dancing to this song. Always remember that for some reason …
Hahahahaha … also just found “Sadeness” by Enigma. Everytime my friend Beav was having sex with her bf, John, across the hall from me, she’d blast this song. That’s how we knew she was getting action. I might have to buy this entire Itunes 1991 mix …
“Disappear” by INXS. That always reminds me of my bf, Ira. When we fooled around it was always to this INXS CD or this one Eric Clapton CD. Everytime I hear the song “Running on Faith” it reminds me of losing my virginity. Ira. He was a nice guy. *Sigh* My life was so much less complicated back then …
I have really enjoyed this walk down memory lane. I hope you have, also.
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My friend, Deb, from college, whose blog you can totally link to from my front page, btw, just sent me this awesome email. It totally made my day and I had to share:
have to tell you… I have you linked on my blog. I have a few friends now totally addicted to you blog. They weren’t sure if I really knew you- I am so not cool anymore- actually I never was huh? so thanks for linking me on your blog because they believe me now. anyway wanted to let you know that your circle is wider than you think. I read it all the time, makes me laugh. and for the record, I have lots of memories of Bad Lisa and not so many of Good Lisa…
Deb is totally selling herself short. She could hold a gallon water jug under her breast AND she was dating an Australian guy. She was fully a lot cooler than she remembers …
Thanks, D. You totally brightened up my night with that email. “Cause you … you light up my life … you give me hope … to carry on … “ I’m totally downloading that from Itunes right now. If there was ever any doubt.
Btw, Gossip Girl rocked the house tonight. As always. If you don’t watch this show, you might be partially retarded. It is THAT good. So much scandal.
I went to this Boot Camp class at the gym today and I think I might die. My legs are killing me. KILLING ME. Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow … hurts.
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