And This is How I Spend My Saturday Night …

watching the Indiana Jones movie with that irritating Shia LeDouche and scouring the internet for information on Bears/Titans tomorrow.  Thank God it’s a nationally televised game so I don’t have to deal with “Pam” or whatever the hell  her name is and listen to her talk about her sex life.  Just roll out of bed, run across the street to Starbucks and settle in for the game.  And by “settle in”, I mean put on my Butkus jersey and then scream and curse at the t.v. loud enough to scare the neighbors.  Even though I think Grossman is starting tomorrow … I have a feeling we might win this one.  A number of factors in our favor:

(a) Tennessee hasn’t lost yet.  8-0.  They are due.

(b) Grossman, although far from consistent, is incredibly streaky and can pull off a brilliant performance.  Unfortunately, it doesn’t appear that there are any signs to predict whether he’ll be amazing or shit.  Completely not dependent on anything normal, i.e., the fact that he hasn’t started a game for a year.  I think if certain planets align and someone sacrifices a goat in their bathtub in the opponent’s city, he plays a good game, but it’s not conclusive evidence.

I just spent an hour online trying to find the Bears’ win-loss records for the game played directly after the presidential election to see if they usually win or lose.  No, I do not have a life, thanks for asking.  I know that in 2004, they beat the Giants in Game 9.  Aside from that, I haven’t found anything … yet. 

And this is why I do not have a boyfriend.  Because I’m too tense to go out anywhere tonight when a big game is taking place on Sunday.  I need to be home near my computer for breaking developments.  Most. Obsessed. Fan. Ever.  Rex Grossman is lucky that I don’t have his phone number, although, I bet I could get it if I really wanted it bad enough.  I have my sources.  However, since I don’t want to miss the game while I’m going through central booking on my stalking charge, I think I’ll refrain.